The pursuit of happiness isn’t about success

Illustration by Sami Seyedhosseini, Cartoonist

Aren’t we all in the pursuit of happiness? As children, many of us would run around declaring that one day you were going to be a doctor, a veterinarian, an astronaut — maybe even the greatest one yet. We’d ask Santa for a kitchen playset to make meals of plastic blocks or a stethoscope and lab coat to assure everyone that the family dog would be okay.

Our “dream job” often changed depending on what our young minds were feeling inspired by or what we were curious to learn more about at the time.

One day, these titles start to stick. As we learn more about ourselves and the lives we hope to build, they may evolve or become more focused — but they also gain new meaning.

This, my friends, is what we call passion.

Once, a professor of mine told our class that when we are applying or interviewing for a job, we should never say we are “passionate about something” or “have a passion to do something,” but rather refer to it as empathy.

Passion fuels the fire inside us to work toward something, but empathy is what reminds us of that work’s impact on people, on the world, on more than ourselves. Passion tells us who we want to be and what we want to achieve. Empathy guides us. It shows us the best way to achieve those things. Sometimes it is clear when a person forgets to listen to empathy.

So, what does a pursuit of happiness entail? Over the course of our lives, we search for stability in our careers and relationships. The mark we will leave behind, our legacy. To some, that legacy is creating a beautiful family or success in our professional life. Most people crave both.

The common phrase, “money doesn’t buy happiness,” speaks to this. The power is in our passions and dreams.

I am pursuing a career in film and television. Many times I have been asked, “What if you don’t make any money?” Sure, money is important in the aspect of having food, shelter, health care, etc. But, for me, nothing beats the feeling of sitting in a writers room and creating the beats of a story or sitting in Contra and fleshing out all my ideas onto a page, especially on the final draft.

Last summer, I met a film director who asked me what I would do if I couldn’t be a writer. I laughed and told him I would keep writing. He asked what would happen if I failed, and again I laughed and said I would keep writing. He smiled and told me that was the right answer to his questions. Because nothing can replace it.

This narrative can relay to anything — creating architectural designs, performing surgery, being a teacher and on and on.

Of course, not everyone has the luxury of pursuing exactly what they want for many reasons. Life can get in the way of that. But if you have the chance, it will always be the most rewarding experience.

Self-doubt can be an obstacle in this, but you can always fail at a backup plan. And what’s the point of spending time pouring yourself into things that don’t serve you?

Ask yourself: if money were unlimited, if you had any opportunity to do whatever it is that you want, what would you go for? Who would you want to be?

In the end, the truest pursuit of happiness is not chasing success, but daring to be yourself.